


Because of This, Because of Us

by Madalynn_Bohemia



Series: Life Worth Living [2]
Category: The Last of Us
Genre: Cussing, Ellie (The Last of Us) - Freeform, Gen, Joel (The Last of Us) - Freeform, Slight Ellie/Joel, Spoilers, The Last of Us (Game), Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-25
Updated: 2013-06-25
Packaged: 2017-12-16 03:23:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/857197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Madalynn_Bohemia/pseuds/Madalynn_Bohemia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You know the saying: The more things change, the more they stay the same. Why should it be any different now? Ellie and Joel get another shot at life, but by no means is it any easier. Nor is it the hardship it was before. If anything, it's all much of the same.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Because of This, Because of Us

**Author's Note:**

> So, I wrote another one. I guess it's not out of my system yet. It seems this game just wont leave me. Writing helps to fill the void. I warn you now: SPOILERS!

On their first official night as residents in Jackson, Tommy pulls Joel aside with a question written all over his face. 

Joel shakes his head and watches as his little brother's shoulders slump.

"They stopped looking for a cure a long time ago." Joel has to say it. Feels the taint of a lie on his tongue, but he has to put it out there. Has to believe it.

"You made it back." Tommy says, gathering himself quickly. "That's what's important. How the hell did you do it?" 

Joel's eyes glass over ever so slightly, seeing things only he can. 

"Having someone watching your back who is as determined to survive as you are helps." Joel answers. It doesn't even cover a fraction of what Ellie is to him, but in this case, words are inadequate. "That, and luck." He adds to lighten the mood, and Tommy smiles obligingly. 

"I've arranged a room that you both can call your own. It's not much, but it's something. Unless you would rather be alone?"

It's a question that hangs in the air for a moment before Tommy rushes on, seeing the confused look on his brother's face.

"Ellie is safe now. I could set her up with another family? The Riley's never could have children of their own and-"

"No." Joel cuts in sharply, voice firm. "She stays with me."

At Tommy's knowing smile, he realizes that his brother knew his answer all along. 

"Okay." He grins, turning to lead the way to what will be their new home, and Joel follows, feeling elevated.

~*8*~

Ellie lays on the bed near the opposite wall as Joel cleans his weapons. He refuses to quit his grueling routine that kept them alive on the road. 

"You're not gonna go watch a movie with the others?" He asks, dismantling the revolver.

“Nah.” Ellie says, twirling an arrowhead between her fingers. Joel had found it near the wall and gave it to her after explaining its history. It was fast becoming her favorite possession. Next to her gun, of course. “They’re showing the one with the princess who gets put to sleep again.”

Joel vaguely remembers watching something like that with Sarah.

“Anyway, the whole fucking kingdom gets knocked out, and they all have to wait for some prince to save them.”

“Sleeping Beauty.” Joel says suddenly, the title coming to him like a gunshot. “Yeah, I remember that one. He has to kiss her to break the spell.”

Ellie scoffs, and Joel finds it hard to visualize her with all the other kids her age, finding joy in a movie like that. For all that she looks fourteen, Ellie is not like others her age. Not at all.

“It’s kind of neat to think about, though.” She says, throwing her arrowhead in the air, only to catch it smoothly.

“What’s that?” Joel ask, reassembling the gun.

“That the whole kingdom could be saved by one person.”

Joel’s hands stop moving, and he tries not to shake too much. 

“People want to believe in fairy tales because there’s no gray area. The prince saves the princess, the villain dies, and there’s a happy ending. It’s unrealistic.” He answers, continuing in his task.

Ellie grins, sitting up to look at Joel from across the way.

“Oh, I don’t know. Some might look at you and compare you to a prince, or even a hero, like in one of my books.”

Joel can’t help it. He snorts and chokes on his own laughter. 

“I’m serious.” Ellie says with amusement. “You’ve saved me loads of times.” She motions to the room around them. “Wouldn’t you call this a happy ending?”

Joel is still chuckling when he answers. “I’m no prince. And you’re sure as hell no princess.”

Ellie glowers and throws a pillow at him.

“What I mean,” Joel says, blocking the cushion from hitting his face, “is that every princess in almost every movie I’ve seen is a damsel in distress.”

“A damsel?” Ellie asks, trying the word out.

“Yeah, like...she needs rescuing all the time. You, on the other hand, are more capable then most. You can take care of yourself.”

It is the best complement Ellie thinks she’s ever received.

~*8*~

Joel thinks one of the best parts about living near a dam is they will never go thirsty. He can remember going days without finding a clean water source to drink from. How the heat could play tricks on the mind, making it believable that there was water in the distance, just beyond reach.

It’s good not to have to worry about stuff like that. Another good thing, is that there are now plenty of opportunities to teach Ellie how to swim, which she isn’t too thrilled about. 

Joel’s in a pair of shorts and Ellie’s got one of his light T-shirts on. He doesn’t want her to be encumbered by clothes dragging her down, and it’s not as if their in supply of bathing suits. 

“Fuck, it’s cold.” Ellie grits out through clenched teeth.

“You’ll get used to it.” Joel promises, treading water a little ways in front of her. Ellie still stays where her feet can touch the bottom, and Joel waits patiently for her to motion him to her.

“Why are we doing this again?” She asks and Joel raises an eyebrow at her. As if she needs reminding. 

“It’s not like I’m ever gonna leave this place.” She mutters, and Joel sighs. 

“The point is, we don’t know what’s gonna happen today, tomorrow, or a year from now. The point,” he says, pausing till she looks at him, “is to be prepared.”

Ellie lets out an irritated breath, but concedes with a nod. 

“Okay, I’m ready.” She holds out her hands and Joel swims to her, taking first one, and then the other, he leads Ellie to deeper waters.

“It’s alright.” He soothes when she begins to tense. “I got you.”

Joel’s hands move to grasp her about the waist, keeping her above the surface. “Kick your heels and move your legs in a circular motion. Do the same with your arms.”

Ellie does as she’s told, treading water with his help. 

“Not bad.” Joel encourages. “It’s almost natural for your body to float, but if you panic, it’s gonna be all too easy to sink, understand?” Ellie nods, and Joel can see that she’s scared because she knows what’s coming, but she doesn’t try to avoid it. She faces the challenge head on.

“I’m gonna let you go, but I’ll be right here, okay? Nothing is gonna happen to you.”

Ellie takes in a breath, her green eyes piercing his as she nods again, and Joel’s hands drop away.

Ellie sinks about an inch, but just like he taught her, she tilts her head back and keeps her airway open. Her limbs are working double time, fighting to stay above the surface.

She has no grace yet, but he can see the makings of a strong swimmer, and that is enough to put a smile on his face.

Ellie gains some ground, so to speak. Her arms cut through the water, using it to propel her up until her shoulders break the top and stay there. She’s already getting the hang of it.

“Can I go underwater now?” She asks, and Joel has to force his laughter into the confines of a small chuckle. She can bring that out of him so easily now, and there were times in the past he thought he’d never know joy again. 

“Let’s wait on that particular lesson until you got the breaststroke down.” 

Joel brings her into his arms again, helping to maneuver her till she’s flat on her back, floating on the water’s surface. Ellie settles, lost in watching the clouds in the sky float by.

Joel’s got a hand on the small of her back, giving her stability. He waits until he knows she’s distracted, her body knowing what to do. Slowly, he removes his hand. 

It’s one of the easiest things, but he can’t shake off the pride he feels. Ellie is keeping herself afloat. 

“That one looks like a face.” She says, reaching up to point at a passing cloud. She upsets her balance by moving, but Joel is there in an instant to right her. 

Ellie lets out a startled laugh, punching him playfully on the shoulder. “You ass. You’re not supposed to let go without telling me.” 

“But I caught you, didn’t I.” He argues, and Ellie gives him a soft smile. 

“Yeah, you did.”

~*8*~

Ellie tears their room apart, searching.

“Somebody had to have taken it.” She accuses, and Joel’s eyes follow her progress. 

“Why do you say that?”

Ellie snaps out her answer, trying to remember that it isn’t Joel who she’s angry with.

“Because, I always keep it under my pillow when it’s not on me.”

“Maybe you misplaced it in a pocket or something.” He suggest and Ellie glares daggers in his direction.

“Joel, you of all people should understand. What with the way we had to live, do you think I would misplace anything?”

Joel’s eyes gleam with a mischievous streak that he’s acquired since they came here, and she’s had to get used to.

“Maybe this place has dulled your edge.”

Ellie ceases in her search to give him a wide eyed stare of dismay, and Joel cannot keep up the charade any longer. 

“I’m kidding. Your edge is fine.” He concedes, and Ellie still glares as she goes back to looking.

“Is that thing really important to you?” Joel asks, genuinely curious. 

“Of course it is.” Ellie answers while she practically flips her mattress. “It’s cool, and you-” She hesitates briefly before continuing as if she never stopped. “You gave it to me.”

Joel sighs, deciding to put an end to her torture.

“Well, I was gonna wait till tomorrow, but you don’t make it easy, do you?”

Ellie stops what she’s doing to look at him, watches as he pulls her prize from his back pocket.

There, dangling from his fingers, is her arrowhead. He had a leather string with a clasp fashioned, woven around the end so she could wear it as a necklace.

“Happy fifteenth birthday, Ellie.”

Ellie can’t move. She had only told him once, in passing. Birthdays were relatively something that weren’t usually celebrated. After all, who would want to mark the day they were born into a world such as this? Another year alive, who knew if you would get one more...

But this...

Ellie finally moved forward, delicately taking his gift from his fingers. She admired the craftsmanship before her eyes sought his. She was crying now, over a present. It felt like a silly thing to cry over. 

Wordlessly, he took the necklace back and unfastened it. Gently lifting her hair out of the way, he secured the clasp and stepped back to get a good look.

“Not too bad, if I do say so myself.” Joel said, trying to break the quiet.

Ellie threw herself at him, hugging him about the waist and squeezing as if her life depended on it. 

“Thank you.” She whispered over and over, Joel’s hand coming up to cup the back of her head. 

“Happy birthday, Ellie.” He repeated, and for once, she could agree with that statement. 

It was a happy birthday after all.

~*8*~

Joel sighs in exhaustion. He doesn’t want to talk about this. Doesn’t want to bring the subject up, but Tommy had been right. Things were different now, and he had to realize that. Ellie had to realize it. Taking in a deep breath, he opened the door.

Ellie was laying on her bed, reading a book he didn’t recognize. 

“Did you get that from the library?” He asked and she shook her head. Of course she didn’t.

“I found it by A-block. Thought I’d hold onto it for safe keeping.”

“You know you don’t have to steal any more.” Joel said, but he knew it was falling on deaf ears. “There’s a whole library full of books you can borrow from, legitimately.”

Ellie snorted.

“What are you reading anyway?”

He watched as a grin crossed her face. She did enjoy telling him about the stories she found. 

“I don’t know. The book is kind of falling apart, and it’s mostly faded, but from what I can read it’s about this boy who hates the people in his life. Anyway, one night he goes to sleep wishing that they would all just disappear, and the next morning, he wakes up and everyone is gone. He’s like the only one left.”

Joel frowns. “That sounds terrible.” 

Ellie looks back at her crumbling book. “Yeah, it does.” She tosses it on her nightstand, no doubt already forgotten.

“What’s up? You’ve got that look on your face.”

“What look? I don’t have a look.”

“Yes you do.” Ellie says with a sigh. “It shows up on your face whenever you’re about to bring up something you really don’t want to and you know I don’t want to hear.”

Joel’s frown deepened. Was he really so transparent?

“Tommy tells me you don’t want to go to school with the others.”

Ellie let out an annoyed sigh. “I just don’t see the point. If I know algebra is that going to save me from a horde of infected. If I can write essays and recite poetry is that going to stop a hunter from shooting me? It’s stupid.”

Joel collapsed on his own bed and ran a hand over his face. “That’s not our life anymore. It doesn’t have to be like that.”

“We don’t know what’s going to happen today, tomorrow, or next year.” She quoted. “Your words, Joel. Let the other kids go to school. Now if you want to teach me more about swimming, or shooting, or surviving, I’m all for that. Everything else is just a luxury that I don’t have time for.”

“What about socializing?” Joel pressed, bringing up the other issue Tommy had mentioned.

“What about it? Half the time you complain I talk too much.”

Joel shook his head. “I’m not talking about me, I’m talking about others your age. You never reach out to them.”

Ellie stood, body radiating with anger. “What the fuck is this? I’m being watched now? Do you have me followed?”

“Tommy mentioned that your distance towards everyone is giving him a cause for concern.”

“Well tell him to shove his concern up his ass, I have you, don’t I?”

It almost hurt that she had to phrase it as a question.

“Of course you have me.” Joel answered, moving to stand before her. “But, Ellie, it doesn’t have to just be me and you anymore. I know that that’s what we had to count on all those months out there, but in here, it doesn’t just have to be like that. There should be more to your life than me. I wont always be around-”

“Don’t.” Ellie demanded, voice trembling with emotion. “Don’t even go there. Don’t say it, don’t think it.”

Joel sighed, shoulders slumping. He didn’t know why he was fighting with her, anyway. He was with Ellie on this one. 

“Alright.” He conceded. “You’re right. Things are fine the way they are. I’ll let Tommy know. He can take his concern and shove it up his ass.”

Ellie couldn’t help but let out a surprised laugh that was half joy, half sadness. Joel didn’t embrace her, those moments were rare, which made them all the more precious, but he did reach his hand out. Allowed his fingers to run through the loose strands of her red hair that had fallen out of her ponytail. He gifted her with a smirk before tugging affectionately on the soft locks. 

“Just you and me, kid.” 

~*8*~

“Do you ever miss it?” Ellie asks one night, staring at the darkened ceiling. She knows Joel isn’t asleep, and she hears his grumbling response from across the way.

“Miss what?”

“Being out there. Outside the wall.”

A deep silence settles over the room, so Ellie presses on. 

“Sometimes, I can’t help but miss it.” She admits softly. “I wake up thinking we have to run again. I feel like hunters are after us, or infected have moved into the area...but than I remember we’re safe, and I...I feel a little disappointed.” She laughs ruefully. “What does that make me? How is that not psycho.”

She hears Joel breathe deeply.

“You get used to a certain way of living.” He says. “People think surviving out there is the hard part, but the truth is, if you have it in you, it’s easy. Human nature is to survive, to do whatever it takes. Living is the hard part.”

Ellie’s eyes search him out in the dark. 

“For a long time, I only knew how to kill. Trust no one, shoot first, think about it later. Now, there are all these families here, counting on each other. It’s a lot to get used to. It’s not easy adjusting your way of life overnight, but we will. I promise.”

Ellie’s eyes find the ceiling again. He never answered her question, but in a way, she already had her answer. Across the room, Joel shifted till he faced the wall.

“Yeah. I miss it too, sometimes.” She heard him whisper, and she couldn’t help but smirk. It wasn’t like he could see it anyways. “I guess we’re both a little crazy.” He added, and Ellie snorted in amusement. 

She could live with that. 

~*8*~

Ellie was beyond angry. She was terrified. 

Usually, their little city was self-sufficient. They grew their own food, made their own energy. But sometimes, winter was harsh, and they had to go outside the wall to hunt and search for sustenance.

There was a group of five total that had volunteered to venture out, and Joel had been among the first. 

“Were you even going to tell me?” Ellie had demanded once they reached their room, opting not to cause a scene in front of the others. Joel hated scenes.

“I just did, Ellie. What do you want me to do?” 

“You volunteered! In front of everyone before even discussing it with me!”

“What is there to discuss? We need food, I’m gonna get us some. End of discussion.”

“And what if something happens out there, huh? Where does that leave me?”

“Safe.” Joel answered and Ellie trembled with the force of her anger.

“Bullshit.” She whispered, shoulders squaring as she held her ground. “That’s bullshit, and you know it.”

Joel did not answer as he continued to gather his gear. Ellie reached for her own backpack.

“Fine. I’m going with you.” She declared, and that stopped Joel in his tracks. 

“Like hell you are.” 

“You’re gonna need someone to watch your back. Even you can’t argue that I’m the best person for the job.”

“Ellie.” He warned. “You are staying here.”

Ellie threw down her pack as her fury exploded. “You don’t get to make that choice!” She yelled. “You don’t just get to decide to abandon me and then try to tell me what to do!”

Joel’s own anger vanished instantly. Ellie was more terrified then anything, and he now knew why.

Moving to stand directly before her, he took Ellie’s face in his rough hands, wiping away the tears that had begun to fall. She seemed to be more emotional lately.

“I am not abandoning you, do you hear me?” He demanded, but she remained still.

“Ellie, look at me.” Reluctantly, she did so.

“I’m coming back. Do you understand? Nothing so far has been able to keep me from you, and nothing will.”

“You said it though. You said one day our luck is gonna run out.” She argued softly, and Joel gently moved the hair out of her face.

“I did say that, didn’t I?” He sighed and pulled her closer, wrapping her up in his arms. “We need food, Ellie. You need food. If I can get it for you, I will. But I promise, I wont put myself in danger. My priority is to come back.” 

His words were soothing, but Ellie couldn’t chase away the fear in her stomach that was begging her to stop him from leaving. 

“Okay.” She said instead, and Joel moved back enough to look her in the eyes. 

“You promise me that you’ll stay here. That you’ll stay safe.”

She didn’t hesitate.

“I promise. Can you swear to me that you’ll come back?”

His voice was steady in his answer. “I swear.”

It seems they were both lying.

~*8*~

They’ve already caught six rabbits, a boar, and two deer. They’re tracking a buck along the outskirts of the forest when Joel feels it. It isn’t so much a feeling as it is a sixth sense. His stomach is clenched in knots, and the hair along the back of his neck is standing up.

It’s too quiet here, and everything inside of him his screaming that he turn back around. His instincts have kept him alive this far, so he gives the signal to stop and the others halt without question.

“We should turn back.” Joel says.

“Why?” Ben scoffs, holding his rifle close. “We almost got this. One more good one and then we’re done.” Beside him, Matt agrees.

“I don’t know.” Michelle interjects, eyeing the trees above them. “I think Joel’s right, I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”

“Why do you say that?” Lenore asks softly from behind Joel.

“Look,” Ben says, not at all hiding his irritation, “my family is not going hungry because of your feelings. Now let’s all just stop acting like teenagers and get this done.”

Joel wants to refuse. Tell the guy to fuck off and be done with it, but things aren’t like the way they were before. He’s not the leader like he was with Ellie. This isn’t even about him, really, and he can’t leave the others and walk away. 

Against his better judgment, he sticks it out, following along as they mark the tracks in the snow. 

It comes as a surprise, and at the same time it’s utterly expected. Within seconds, their little group is surrounded by four clickers. 

Joel manages to hit one straight away with his rifle, pulling his side arm free so he doesn’t have to reload. He hears Ben scream, and turns in time to see one ripping his throat to shreds. 

“Goddamn it.” Joel mutters as he shoots it in the head. Ben’s blood pours out, staining the white snow a deep crimson. 

To his left Lenore cries, and Joel rushes over. She’s got a clicker on top of her, and she’s only just managing to keep it from biting at her face. Joel grips it by the arms and pulls it off, firing off three rounds until it stays still. The others are scattered, running away rather than holding their ground. 

Quickly, Joel does a mental count. He’s taken down three, but where is the other-

He’s gripped from behind, can feel the putrid breath on his neck, and distantly he hears Lenore scream his name. 

This is it.

The gunshot echoes close to his ear and he’s pushed forward with enough force that he’s brought to his knees. Beside him, the clicker falls to the ground, half of what used to be its face is blown away. 

Joel’s eyes search until a ray of fading sunlight bounces off of something on top of the nearby hill. Ellie’s familiar form stands to full height and Joel takes in a deep shuddering breath of frozen air. 

He’s never been happier to see her. He’s also never been so furious. 

~

They take care of Ben discretely, ensuring that he doesn’t turn. Joel can’t help but be grateful that they’ve brought the pull cart that Tommy had insisted on.

They load up the boar, six rabbits, two deer, and the buck they’d been tracking. Turns out Ellie had bagged it with a bow earlier.

Ben’s body goes on the cart as well, wrapped up in a sheet and kept away from the rest of the haul. Poor bastard had a family. A wife and two kids. This is gonna break them. 

They reenter the city solemnly, heads heavy and eyes downcast. 

Joel hasn’t said a word to Ellie, has barely even acknowledged her. But she hasn’t spoken a word to him either, and it isn’t his imagination that tells him she’s just as disappointed with him as he is with her.

They’re met by both Tommy and Maria. Tommy eyes Ellie incredulously, realization dawning on him swiftly.

“Not now.” Joel says, he doesn’t need help from his brother, he’ll deal with it himself. 

“Where’s Ben?” Maria asks, looking around at their group.

“We ran into some trouble.” Joel says, moving aside so that they can see the body on the cart. “Four clickers, just on the outer ridge of the forest.”

“Jesus.” Tommy says, shaking his head as he eyes the covered body. 

“They were all in the deep stages of infection.” Michelle says, “Joel and Ellie took care of them. I don’t think there are many more of them in the area.”

Tommy rubs a hand over his face but he nods in understanding. “I’m gonna have to tell the family.” He says and Maria grasps his arm, giving it a squeeze. 

“I’ll go with you.” 

Joel watches them leave, stunned when Ellie begins to follow.

“Ellie.” He grits out in warning but she ignores him and instead picks up the pace.

Gathering what little patience he has left, Joel goes after her.

~

They watch from a distance as Maria and Tommy tell Ben’s wife, Jasmine.

She tries to keep it together at first, but that lasts for all of three seconds before she falls apart, collapsing into Maria’s arms. Beside him, Ellie takes in a shuddering breath. Joel can tell she’s upset, but he doesn’t know what to say, if there even is anything to say at a time like this.

Without so much as a word, Ellie turns and walks away. Silently, Joel follows. 

All hell breaks loose when the door to their room is closed behind them. 

“Goddamn it, Ellie. What were you thinking?”

Ellie stares at him, mouth open wide in shock and eyes full of utter dismay.

“You wanna know what I was thinking? I was thinking that my priority was keeping your ass alive. And guess what, I did. Not that you thanked me, or anything.” She muttered, turning her back to him once more.

“Jesus, Ellie what if something had happened to you? It’s not like I would’ve known where you were. You promised you would stay here.”

“And you promised me you would come back!” Ellie yelled. “First of all, that’s a stupid promise to make. Even you can’t guarantee your own safety, and secondly, if it wasn’t for me, you would have been that clicker’s next meal. I mean, what was that, Joel? What happened to, ‘I wont put myself in unnecessary danger,’ huh?” 

Joel sighed and collapsed on his bed, running a hand through his hair. Damn, but he was tired.

“Ellie, you can’t just go over the wall without telling someone-”

“Save it.” Ellie spit out. “Ever since we got here you’ve found it convenient to forget that it was me out there with you all that time. It was me watching your back and helping to keep us safe. Just cause we don’t have to do it anymore doesn’t suddenly make me incapable.”

“I never said you were-”

“No, but you refused to let me come with you. If you go, I go, Joel. That’s how it has to be. Otherwise, don’t blame me if I have to get creative like I did today.” 

Joel stayed quiet as she took in a deep breath and gathered herself. 

“If I hadn’t been there, You could’ve ended up like Ben, and I would be getting a knock on the door right now. Tommy would be telling me that you didn’t come back and I would have to live with the fact that if I had just been there, I could’ve changed the outcome. So don’t you dare get pissed at me that I refuse to accept the alternative.”

She had a point, and again Joel found his anger slipping away from him. 

“What if you had gotten infected?” He heard her small voice ask.

“Ellie-”

“That would be worse. All this is eating at me, Joel. If I hadn’t been so selfish, I could’ve ended people’s fear of turning into one of those things. I could’ve-”

“Hey.” Joel said sharply, cutting off that thought before it began. They haven’t talked about what happened at that hospital in Utah. It’s something they both know and silently acknowledge, but never bring up. 

“Nothing you’re thinking right now would’ve helped anybody, okay? It was never a sure thing that they could have reversed the process. The only thing that was for sure, was that you would have died. Now don’t you hound me on putting yourself at risk to keep me alive and then go off about sacrificing yourself, do you hear? You can’t do that to me, understand? You can’t-”

It was suddenly hard to speak and Ellie’s eyes never left his as he searched for the right words.

“I can’t be without you, okay? I can’t go back to the way things were before. I don’t care about anything else. I know how that sounds, and I know that it doesn’t say much for my character, but honestly, I could give a shit. As long as you’re okay...”

Ellie’s lip quivered as she fought to pull herself under control, and failed, falling helplessly apart right in front of him. 

“You think it’s any better for me? You think I would be able to last one day without you? If they had told me that I lost you-”

She never finishes, because Joel is there in an instant, pulling her to him, because if he doesn’t he’ll lose himself. She keeps him grounded.

“Hush, baby girl. Hush.” He soothes. “Everything’s gonna be fine.”

He’s only called her that a handful of times, but somehow, it makes her fell lighter. More safe. Dare she even think loved? 

“Make me another promise.” She whispers, wiping her eyes and stepping away, and Joel cannot help but snort good naturedly. 

“Haven’t you had enough of those?”

“It’s different this time. Just...” Her fingers move up to fidget with the arrowhead resting against her throat in a nervous gesture. “You can’t try to leave me behind again. If you go outside the wall, so do I. If you ever leave here, I go with you, and you don’t try to stop me. You let me watch your back again. Swear it to me?”

It isn’t even a hardship for Joel to agree.

~*8*~

It’s movie night again. Another fairy tale, no doubt. Like before, Ellie and Joel aren’t in attendance. 

He’d gathered up some blankets earlier, laying them out in the open grassy area behind their living quarters. What little lights they have in their city do nothing to block out the view of the sky, and upon Ellie’s urging, Joel begins to explain constellations. 

“You see that group of stars right there? The one that kind of looks like a cross?”

“I think so.” Ellie answers from beside him. She lays close to his side, keeping warm.

“That’s Cygnus, the swan.”

“Tell me about it.”

“Story goes that Cygnus had a friend name Phaeton. The two would just about compete over everything. So one day, they challenge each other to a race across the sky.”

“Is that even possible.” Ellie interrupts, and Joel can’t help but smirk at her skepticism.

“Hush.” He replies. “As I was saying, they have their race across the sky, but they both get too close to the sun. Their chariots burn up and they fall to the earth. Now, Cygnus was immortal, and upon recovering, searched for his friend. He found Phaeton at the bottom of a river, trapped by the roots of a tree. 

“Cygnus tried to retrieve his friend’s body so he could give him a proper burial, but it was too far to swim and no matter how many times he tried, couldn’t reach him. Cygnus begged Zeus; king of the Gods, to help him. Zeus replied that if he gave Cygnus the body of a swan, he could easily reach his friend. 

“However, if Cygnus took on the body of a swan, he would also be giving up his immortality, and would only live as long as any other swan normally lives. Cygnus agreed in order to retrieve his Phaeton’s body and give him a proper burial, so he could go to the afterlife. In honor of his unselfish act, Zeus placed the image of a swan in the sky.”

“So, he didn’t change him back?” Ellie demanded.

“Nope.” 

“Zeus sounds like a dick.”

“He is.” Joel answered in amusement.

“So all these stars have a story?”

“Every single one. Some only appear in the sky at certain times of the year. They can be used to get your bearings. For navigation and things like that.” He said off-handedly.

“Can you teach me?” Ellie asked softly from beside him, and Joel took his gaze away from the sky to fix it on her.

“I’ll teach you everything I can.” He promised, and Ellie’s pleased look was all he needed.

“Tell me about that one.” She said, pointing to a familiar constellation he knew quite well. 

“That would be Draco. The last dragon to be slain.”

“Joel?”

“Yeah?”

“What’s a dragon?”

Joel laughed, and once his mirth was under control, he began another story.


End file.
